Category Archives: climbing
before i dive into my latest rambling, i want to first acknowledge the horrific events occuring in japan. my positive thoughts go out to all the people affected. events like these make me feel badly for ever complaining. i know everyone has her own problems, but sometimes i feel shallow and stupid for worrying about what i worry about. my heart goes out to all the victims. i hope the healing process can begin soon…
(and on another side note, thank you all so much for your sweet, sweet comments. there were so thoughtful and heartfelt and i really appreciate them!)
i have never been a very independent person. i am shy, quick to over analyze, and grow anxious very, very fast in certain situations. i am hesitant to try new things alone and usually end up dragging a friend with me.
now, however, i see just how utterly important it is to erase the lines i’ve drawn around myself. two days ago, i had a breakthrough. and yesterday? i had a revelation.
breakthrough: thursday afternoon, i went climbing…alone. the only people i climb with are k and our mutual friend, joe. clearly k never lets me know when he climbs and joe never remembers (or chooses not to) inform me of his own climbing schedule so i generally get left out. i wallowed for a bit and grew anxious over the thought of rarely climbing again but then it hit me: i have myself. if people i considered friends suddenly want to leave me out of their lives, so be it. i have myself and i have legs that can take me to the wall. i have a voice to ask people for a belay. i have the ability to climb alone. so i did. and guess what? it was a blast! i almost chickened out, too. i’m so glad i didn’t! i cannot tell you the confidence i felt after climbing solo yesterday. i felt empowered and so capable.
revelation: i am the only person standing in the way of experiencing life. by doling out excuse after excuse, i am essentially denying myself opportunities — for fun, for growth, for learning. by sticking to the main road instead of carving out a new trail in a new direction, i am only deepening the grooves of paths i’ve walked a million and a half times. where’s the excitement in that? where’s the adventure? i’m so sick of not trying things i want to try simply because i am scared.
confidence comes from testing yourself. confidence comes from pushing past your comfort zones and truly discovering what you are capable of.
each day i’ve been trying to push past my comfort zone. i’ve been trying to listen to my inner voice and ignore the negative voice i tend to listen to more often. two days ago i went climbing alone. yesterday, i experienced a pretty powerful revelation. today? well…
today, i quit an hour long yoga podcast twenty minutes from the end. why? because i realized i hate baptise power yoga. because i realized the thought it of produced anxiety in my chest. because i realized i only pushed myself through it purely for a work out, not for a reconnection of mind and body. because when david farmer said “be true to you” i realized i wasn’t. so i stopped. i never stop a work out.ever. as a person attempting to calm my compulsive exercising habit, i think i just did myself a huge favor: i just acted out of self-love.
oh, and let me just reassure you — that was not easy. i am feeling an intense need to supplement with more activity. i’m judging. i’m uncomfortable.
yet…isn’t that what the road to self-love is?
aren’t we supposed to feel uncomfortable? isn’t that what moving past comfort zones is? i think so, and i intend to keep on keepin’ on. tomorrow? well, i have a special challenge for myself. i’m excited and nervous and feeling silly for even calling it a challenge. we all start somewhere though, right? i’ll show you tomorrow.
as for the rest of the day…it’s a bit sunny outside. i want to go out on a walk (originally planned pre-quitting yoga. not supplementing, promise!) to clear my mind and enjoy the patches of blue sky. it’s been nice recently, too…
hope you all have a wonderful saturday!
what have you done recently that’s “outside of your comfort zone”? what do you want to do if you haven’t? and what’s keeping you from doing it?!
i’ve made it no secret. i have a new love in my life. he’s earthy. and rough. and makes me all hot and sweaty (how inappropriate am i ;)). and i love it.
ladies and gentleman (if there are any?), allow me to introduce to you to my love: ROCK CLIMBING.
all ropes and fancy harnesses and fake, plastic rocks and different colored tape on marking routes you don’t understand. but rock climbing is also more than this. rock climbing can look like this, too:
chris sharma, badass climber extraordinaire
and professional piece of eye candy (but seriously. ladies who are attracted to guys (and you know what, for that matter, ladies who are attracted to ladies and guys who are attracted to guys!), you have not seen a body worth drooling over till you have seen a rock climber’s body. holy. god. yes, i am fifteen again). here this amazing, amazing climber is doing something called bouldering: climbing rocks without the support of a rope.
and so is this guy, alex honnold, but on a much more intense level. this guy free solos. everything.
including half-dome, pictured above. all 3568 feet of it. without a rope. this is an extreme version of rock climbing that only a small, elite group of people really participate in. this would scare me shitless. talk about bad.ass. for reals.
but let me step back and tell you my brief, yet passionate, love story with rock climbing. the first time i ever climbed, i was a kid, maybe seven or eight, and at a birthday party. as a young girl, i loved to climb everything. i climbed all over the playground, climbed up trees, climbed up rocks. heights never bothered me and still don’t, an advantage i have when climbing. at this party i only got to shimmy up the wall once or twice but i remember loving it. i remember loving the challenge and thinking about how fun it was.
though i loved the experience, i never did it again until college. well, until last semester, really. i am fortunate to have attended (still a weird concept for me. i cannot believe i am not in school any more…) a college with a pretty legit climbing wall. it’s small, yes, but not very many people climb there and the routes are super fun and challenging. can you all guess who got me into climbing? k, of course! he lives and breathes climbing. seriously. he’s amazing to watch on the wall or on the rock and has taught me so much in the past few months.
i remember the first day i went with him and another friend, some time during my junior year. it was scary and intimidating. all the people around me climbed so effortlessly and boasted muscles i only dreamed of. no way was i that strong. after that first day i went only one other time after getting belay certified (being the person with the rope at the bottom of the wall keeping the person climbing alive) and did so with another friend of mine, nate. well, i sucked at belaying and he kind of dropped a few feet, which spooked him a little. naturally, nate freaked out and kind of yelled at me in front of the whole gym. douchey move? hell yes. then he told me i shouldn’t be belaying if i don’t really know how. so i took that comment to heart and never stepped foot on the rock wall floor again.
…till last semester, that is. last semester, my entire life changed. i stopped running. i stopped living, essentially, in my school’s gyms. k bought me a pair of used, mismatched climbing shoes
and i took a deep breath, found some cajones, and tied into my first route.
how was it? exhilerating. frightening. intimidating. i was scared to climb in front of all these people who seemed like climbing experts. i didn’t want to embarrass myself. what i found, however, was a group of thoughtful, encouraging, and incredibly helpful, kind people who wanted nothing for me but to succeed. like in yoga, climbers only want to see fellow climbers achieve their goals.
i have fallen head-over-heels in love with climbing. and no, it is not because my boyfriend climbs. it is because i feel a strength when i climb unlike any other strength i have ever felt. i feel challenged and pushed to my physical limits. with each new improvement, each new monument in my climbing career, i feel empowered.
similar to yoga, climbing allows me to experience my body and all it has to offer. like yoga, climbing requires breath to movement, focus and concentration, a positive mind-set. climbing shows me just how amazing my body truly is and just how much i can accomplish if i put my mind to it.
some people run marathons to prove to themselves their bodies are amazing. me? i climb rocks.
oh, and to top it all off, look what i found the other day at planet granite?
oh yes my loves. that would be a chalk bag (chalk is used to soak up the sweat on your hands). but not any chalk bag. a beatles chalk bag. you would of thought i found a friggin pot of gold with the way i reacted. but no, i did not find a pot of gold. just the most badass chalk bag there ever was.
so if you’ve ever felt like climbing, please, just do it. no one is judging you. everyone is there to support you, actually. gift yourself the gift of climbing and discover the depths of your strength. ’cause you’ve got a lot pack into that little body of yours, believe me 🙂
have you ever climbed? did you like it? do you climb? do you want to climb? tell me about it!
weekend = amazing.
friday night: fun shenanigans with friends involving some adult beverages and children’s games. think uno and cranium. and silliness. lots and lots of silliness. and early morning baking adventures. and late morning kisses and confessions with a certain boy whose name starts with the letter k…
saturday day: cafe gratitude with my mama. wonderful food, soul-soothing company. we spent a good hour and a half chatting over our late lunch. i realize more and more just how lucky i am to have the parents i do.
saturday night: a short and lovely close at work (with said boy!) followed by a long and lovely night paired with a bottle of wine, apples to apples, and friends. and more kisses. lots more kisses.
sunday day: mid-morning brunch with boy followed by a trip to REI for NEW CLIMBING SHOES. gorgeous gorgeous climbing shoes. happiness spilled into the late afternoon and a three mile run turned into an unintentional, complete zen 10k. then family dinner. and lots of laughs and good vibes. which was washed down with two hours of rock climbing in my new gorgeous shoes with gorgeous boy.
sunday night/early morning: i am an idiot. i got boy’s car towed. karma karma karma. the universe smacked me in the face big time. 255 dollars and a monumental lesson learned later the boy and i had a big, big two hour conversation outside of the towing place regarding us and the future. to sum it up: he’s in a good place. i’m in a good place. we’ll be in a good place. we’re taking it slow. i am incandescently happy. (and a jane austen fan).
oh, and i’ve settled on my tattoo idea.
really though, are you surprised? not sure as to where i want this but it speaks to me and has since the moment i saw it on my first solo adventure into cafe gratitude earlier this year.
so even though it’s raining and all signs point to gloomy, i can’t help seeing the sunshine.
how was your weekend?